Monday, February 8, 2010

the DOOR .. !!





i anticipate while staring at the door ...
the wind passes by very firmly
like the touch of a feather
the silence dint make a sound
as i dint feel like taking another breadth
it felt like a moment of peace
before the waves of the sea rose high
i was eagar to be a part of this gesture
a chance to full fill
a moment of pause from the rest of the world....!!!

3 comments:

  1. nice....ummmm am impressed sweetie...!

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  2. All your works seem to be amazing. Although couldn't understand a few works as an amateur in this area, but after seeing your attempts,those made me inspired to give my attempt.

    Sorry if I had changed your version or meaning.I tried my best to key down my thoughts and keep the meaning intact.I added each line after yours to make it rhyming. This is a beginner's attempt and my first attempt.

    I anticipate while staring at the door ...
    Its not definitely like a chore
    the wind passes by very firmly
    the sound which makes me feel lovely
    like the touch of a feather
    in this charming weather
    the silence dint make a sound
    and the presence made me spell bound
    as i dint feel like taking another breadth
    it felt like a moment of peace
    before the waves of the sea rose high
    and before I make a sigh
    i was eagar to be a part of this gesture
    and make it capture
    a chance to full fill
    a chance to make my lost energy re-fill
    a moment of pause from the rest of the world....!!!

    Thx
    Abhi

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  3. wooww it did change the meaning!! i do like wht u have written. thanq for the attempt. it looks like u have spent quiet sometime on it.

    ReplyDelete